If something crazy, unexpected, or funny can happen to me, it will. I realized I am always having misadventures a few years ago, when I went cliff jumping at the gorges in Ithica, NY with my cousin Jen. We hiked down to the gorges and started jumping in and swimming, having a great time. After a while we decided to explore a little and hike some trails that we found. Of course we weren’t wearing the proper foot gear, but hey, we wanted to see what was out there. As we were hiking, I tripped on a large tree root and twisted my ankle. At this point we are in the middle of the woods, with no other hikers in sight, so Jen ends up having to help me walk/half drag me back to the car. As we are returning to the cliffs, from a distance I see a man. Ordinarily this is obviously not a big deal, but there is something odd about this man. I ask my cousin, “um…is that man-“, “Yes” she interrupts and encourages me to keep going. You see, the man is about sixty years old, sitting comfortably on a rock reading his newspaper, with nothing on but his hat, shoes and a smile. We climbed the hill to her car and as we are about to get to the parking spot, Jen is desperately digging into the pockets of her shorts. No keys! Nope not locked in the car, and Jen remembers putting them in her pocket and I’m remembering her jumping into the gorge and talking about how funny her pockets look because they’re blowing up with air in the water. Jen thinks there could be a possibility that the keys fell out of her pocket when she sat down to take off her shoes before jumping. Jen walks and I limp back down to the gorge. The Naked Man is still reading his newspaper and Jen starts looking around near the edge of the gorge, I hang back a little and look around by the path. I want nothing to do with Naked Man. Jen starts looking near where Naked Man is sitting and he asks her what she’s looking for, she tells him her keys. He is sitting, legs crossed, and peers over his newspaper. I am behind him thinking to myself, don’t stand up, don’t stand up! Jen is now directly in front of him searching for the keys. Naked Man slowly stands up! I’m just glad I’m behind him, poor Jen gets a full view. Naked Man starts walking around and looking for the keys with Jen. I don’t know how she is keeping it together at this point. I am trying very hard to keep a straight face. Finally we give up on the keys and Naked Man returns to his newspaper. We climb back up the mountain to the car, not sure what to do next as both our cell phones are locked in the car. We start walking down the road to see if we can find anyone that has a phone. We become desperate and start knocking on people’s doors. No answer. We wander a bit further and we finally see a guy leaving his house and we ask him if he has a cell phone. We tell him our story and he not only allows us to use his phone, but also offers to call his roadside assistance company to help us out. We apologize for taking up his time, but he said it was no problem because it’s getting him out of a party he didn’t want to go to with his girlfriend! When he calls roadside assistance, the operator realizes the car he’s trying to help is not his own and doesn’t let him use it for us. I think when he didn’t know the color or make of “his car”, it gave it away. No problem, we called my Uncle who worked about forty minutes away. One would think this is the end of the story, my Uncle comes, we get the keys, etcetera, but no, the story does not end here. As we are waiting for my Uncle, sitting on a guardrail at a red light, a car slows down and the driver rolls down the window. Lo and behold, it is one of Jen’s professors from Cornell. We are covered in mud, sweating and wearing bathing suits and shorts. Luckily, her proff acts like this is nothing new and finally my Uncle arrives with the keys!
So like I said, anything that could happen, but you think won’t, will happen to me! Oh and also to my cousin….
